The letter R is the embodiment of every American patriot's hope, because it is the end of war and the commencement of reunion. NOT WILLING TO DIE.--392. A Jersey man was very sick, and was not expected to recover. His friends got around his bed, and one of them says: "John do you feel willing to die?" John made an effort to give his views on the subject, and answered with his feeble voice: "I--think--I'd rather stay--where--I'm better acquainted." HER POOR JERRY.--393. An old woman received a letter from the post-office, at New York. Not knowing how to read, and being anxious to know the contents, supposing it to be from one of her absent sons, she called on a person near to read the letter to her. He accordingly began and read--"Charleston, June 23: Dear mother," then making a stop to find out what followed (as the writing was rather bad), the old lady exclaimed: "_Oh, 'tis my poor Jerry, he always stuttered!_" TALL TALK.--394. A Kentuckian was once asked what he considered the boundaries of the United States. "The boundaries of our country, sir?" he replied. "Why, sir, on the north we are bounded by the Aurora Borealis, on the east we are bounded by the rising sun, on the south we are bounded by the procession of the Equinoxes, and on the west by the Day of Judgment." AN EYE TO BUSINESS.--395. The Southerners are, of course, not nearly so commercial a race as the Yankees, but still they are much given to "trading" amongst each other. At an hospital in Gettysburg, an artilleryman, whose leg was to be taken off, no sooner knew that the amputation was decided upon by the doctors, than he turned to another wounded man in the next bed, and, before the operation was performed, had "traded" the boot, which was henceforth to be of no use to him. WHAT A FINE WOMAN IS LIKE.--396. A fine woman is like a locomotive, because she draws a train after her, scatters the sparks, and transports the males. If there is any one of our hundred thousand readers has anything that can beat the above we will be pleased to hear from him. TRUTH WANTED.--397. Two years ago, at the Spring Term of the District Court at Topeka, Kansas, Judge Rush Elmore presiding, a witness was called upon the stand. After being sworn, the counsel for the defence said to the witness--a tall, green specimen, and somewhat embarrassed--"Now, sir, stand up and tell your story like a preacher." "No, _sir_!" roared the judge, "none of that; I want you to tell the _truth_!" Just imagine the sheriff, deputies, and bailiffs trying to keep "order" and "silence." AN IRISH BULL AT BULL'S RUN.--398.