The Senator's Bride — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
The Senator's Bride
John Stuart Mill · en
Were all men like these two whom she had loved, she questioned herself,
mournfully. Not one of them was worthy of a true woman's love--no, not
one.
It had come to this--a deserted wife--through no fault of hers was this
tribulation brought on her. She felt that the world had used her hardly
and cruelly. The passion and pride that underlie firm yet sweet natures
like hers, surged up to the surface and buoyed her up above the raging
billows of grief and sorrow. She felt too indignant to weep. She had
almost wept her heart out long ago. She meant to sit still with folded
hands and tranquil heart, and let the cold, harsh world go by heedless
of its pangs, as it was of hers.
Her husband was using her cruelly in bringing this unmerited disgrace
upon her and her child. She half resolved to flee far away with her boy
where he could never find her in the hour when shame and repentance
should drive him back to her side. It was but for a moment. Then she
remembered the brief sentence in his note that commanded her to remain
in his home, and then her resolution wavered; for when Grace Grey had
taken that solemn oath before God to "love, honor, and _obey_," she had
meant to keep her word.
Poor child! for hers was a strangely complex nature--a blending of the
child and woman that we often meet in fine, proud feminine natures, and
never wholly understand.
A hundred conflicting emotions surged madly through her as she sat
there, motionless and pale, until moment after moment went by, and
the overtaxed brain, the overwrought heart gave way, and blessed
unconsciousness stole upon her. With her hands folded loosely in her
lap over that cruel note, a sharp despair shadowed forth in that lovely
face, the stately head fell forward and rested heavily on the pillow
beside the child, whose rosy, unconscious slumber was unbroken, as
though the hovering wings of angels brooded above him and his forsaken
mother.
Norah found her thus when the cooing voice of the awakened babe
reached her ears in the nursery. His pretty black eyes were sparkling
with glee, his rosy lips prattled baby nothings, his dimpled, white
fingers were twisted in the bright curls of his mother's hair as they
swept luxuriantly over the pillow.
With all the art of his babyhood he was trying to win a response from
his strangely silent mother.
She came back to life with a gasping sigh, as Norah dashed a shower of
ice-water into her face, opened her eyes, said, "Don't, Norah, don't!"
and drifted back to the realms of unconsciousness; and so deep was
the swoon that this time all the restoratives of the frightened Norah
failed for a long time of any effect.
"Looks like she's dead!" muttered the Irishwoman, divided between her
care for the child's mother and the child itself, who began to grow
fretful from inattention and hunger.