The Sorrows of Satan: or, The Strange Experience of One Geoffrey Tempest, Millionaire: A Romance — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
The Sorrows of Satan: or, The Strange Experience of One Geoffrey Tempest, Millionaire: A Romance
John Stuart Mill · en
and all the 'jacks-in-office' unite to kick him to death if they can. I
took both kicks and blows in sullen silence and lived on,--not for the
love of life, but simply because I scorned the cowardice of
self-destruction. I was young enough not to part with hope too
easily;--the vague idea I had that my turn would come,--that the
ever-circling wheel of Fortune would perchance lift me up some day as it
now crushed me down, kept me just wearily capable of continuing
existence,--though it was merely a continuance and no more. For about
six months I got some reviewing work on a well-known literary journal.
Thirty novels a week were sent to me to 'criticise,'--I made a habit of
glancing hastily at about eight or ten of them, and writing one column
of rattling abuse concerning these thus casually selected,--the
remainder were never noticed at all. I found that this mode of action
was considered 'smart,' and I managed for a time to please my editor who
paid me the munificent sum of fifteen shillings for my weekly labour.
But on one fatal occasion I happened to change my tactics and warmly
praised a work which my own conscience told me was both original and
excellent. The author of it happened to be an old enemy of the
proprietor of the journal on which I was employed;--my eulogistic review
of the hated individual, unfortunately for me, appeared, with the result
that private spite outweighed public justice, and I was immediately
dismissed.
After this I dragged on in a sufficiently miserable way, doing 'hack
work' for the dailies, and living on promises that never became
realities, till, as I have said, in the early January of the bitter
winter alluded to, I found myself literally penniless and face to face
with starvation, owing a month's rent besides for the poor lodging I
occupied in a back street not far from the British Museum. I had been
out all day trudging from one newspaper office to another, seeking for
work and finding none. Every available post was filled. I had also
tried, unsuccessfully, to dispose of a manuscript of my own,--a work of
fiction which I knew had some merit, but which all the 'readers' in the
publishing offices appeared to find exceptionally worthless. These
'readers' I learned, were most of them novelists themselves, who read
other people's productions in their spare moments and passed judgment on
them. I have always failed to see the justice of this arrangement; to me
it seems merely the way to foster mediocrities and suppress originality.
Common sense points out the fact that the novelist 'reader' who has a
place to maintain for himself in literature would naturally rather
encourage work that is likely to prove ephemeral, than that which might
possibly take a higher footing than his own. Be this as it may, and
however good or bad the system, it was entirely prejudicial to me and my
literary offspring. The last publisher I tried was a kindly man who
looked at my shabby clothes and gaunt face with some commiseration.