The Stronger Influence — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
The Stronger Influence
John Stuart Mill · en
"It is possible to view that astronomical phenomenon from your bedroom
window," he retorted disagreeably.
"I dare say it is. But I wanted the walk."
"You went with Hallam, I suppose?" he said. And, without waiting for
her reply, added: "I think you might have remembered that it was my last
morning. I would have taken you to see the sun rise if you had
expressed the desire. I counted on a last walk."
"I walked with you last night," she said, surprised at the extravagance
of his demands.
"I am not forgetting that," he said, with less aggression in his manner.
"But my last morning... I think it was a little unkind. There will be
plenty of opportunities for sun-gazing after I have gone. I am full up
with things I want to say to you, and you seem such a long way off,
perched up there."
She laughed, and twisted round on the sill preparatory to alighting.
"Look the other way for a minute. I'm coming out."
He swung round with a pleased smile, and before she realised what he was
about he had seized her by the waist and lifted her down. She stood on
the grass beside him and surveyed him with amazed eyes.
"Well!" she said.
"It was by far the easier way," he excused himself. "I have a couple of
chairs fixed up under the trees. It's jolly and cool in the garden."
He led her to the spot he had selected and settled her in one of the two
canvas chairs, which faced towards a little arbour covered with a pale,
cool-looking creeper with long sprays of minute white blossoms thrusting
out between the leaves. The chairs had been placed at the end of the
roughly made path, and stood side by side with their backs towards the
house. Esme dropped into one, and looked about her with lazy
satisfaction. It was restful out here under the trees, and strangely
quiet. The hum of the bees sounded reposeful in the sunny stillness.
She felt very tired, and was glad to sit still. She did not want to
talk. But it was not possible to sit in silence with this man, as it
was with Hallam. The necessity to make conversation was imperative. It
surprised and puzzled her that this was so.
She glanced at Sinclair curiously, and discovered him, with his face
turned towards her, observing her intently. He smiled when he met her
eyes with their curious questioning look; his own expressed admiration,
and something more, which he strove to suppress.
"You were quite right," he said. "It is a wonderful day. But I wish
you had not discovered that before you came out here. I didn't. It
seemed to me this morning a rotten sort of day altogether. I wasn't
sure even that I should see you before I left. I have just half an
hour. If it wasn't for the thought of seeing you again at the other end
I should feel pretty sick at leaving. I've only known you a few days;
but I seem to have known you for quite a long time. That's odd, isn't
it? I've enjoyed the last of my holiday more than words can express."