The Stronger Influence — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
The Stronger Influence
John Stuart Mill · en
Rose, while she watched from her seat in church, the girl standing
before the altar beside the man whose name she was taking, experienced a
curious misgiving which, though she felt it to be unreasonable, she
could not shake off. Largely, she believed, she was influenced by
something Sinclair had said when she informed him of Esme's engagement.
He had been taken by surprise and was greatly upset by the news. She
had very vividly in her memory the sight of his face as he sat and
stared at her with stunned, blue eyes, and muttered hoarsely:
"My God! ... Hallam! ... I could have stood it had it been any one
else."
She had asked him what he meant, what he knew of Hallam? And he had
answered shortly, "Nothing," and gone away hurriedly. She had not seen
him since.
That this scene should come back to her now, obtruding itself in the
middle of the marriage service, struck her as portentous. What had he
meant? Some other emotion deeper than jealousy had moved him surely to
speak as he had done. Her eyes rested contemplatively on Hallam's face.
It was a fine face, a strong face, and the keen eyes were reassuring.
The slight stoop of the shoulders and the reserved inward manner of the
man suggested the scholar and thinker. Rose believed that he was
clever; Jim said so. Neither she nor her husband understood him or felt
at ease in his society. He displayed no interest in any of the family,
save young John, whose conversation seemed to amuse him. John and he
remained on terms of frank friendliness, marked by an air of patronage
on John's side and an entire absence of sentiment on the part of both.
But in relation to the rest he was the same silent unsociable man who
had stayed for months at the Zuurberg without exchanging remarks with
any one.
It puzzled Rose to understand what formed his great attraction in her
sister's eyes. That Esme was very deeply in love was evident; she was
like a girl suddenly transformed; her face was alight with a glow of
happiness which made it beautiful even to Rose's accustomed eyes.
Rose sat and watched her, perplexed and thoughtful, with the strange
uneasiness disturbing her mind and distracting her thoughts from the
service. Why she should feel anxious she did not know; unless it was
the result of Sinclair's speech. But throughout the service the sense
of disaster held with her, and later in the vestry, when the bride was
signing the register, she experienced an overwhelming desire to cry, and
shed a few surreptitious tears with the vexed knowledge that Hallam was
observant of her emotion. Her eyes met his critical gaze a little
defiantly with a faint hostility in them; and she fancied while she
looked back at him that a shadow like a passing regret momentarily
crossed his face. Then abruptly he turned to his wife and bent down and
spoke to her and smiled. The shadow, if it had been there, had left his
face unclouded as before.