Deadlock : $b Pilgrimage, Volume 6 — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
Deadlock : $b Pilgrimage, Volume 6
John Stuart Mill · en
She sought about for some question to justify her presence and perhaps
break the spell, and recovered a memory of the kind of enquiry used by
boarders to sustain their times of association with Mrs. Bailey. In
reply to her announcement that she had come down to ask the best way of
getting to Covent Garden early in the morning Mrs. Bailey sat forward as
if for conversation. The spell was partly broken, but Miriam hardly
recognised the smooth dreamy voice in which Mrs. Bailey echoed the
question, and moved about the room enlarging on her imaginary
enterprise, struggling against the humiliation of being aware of Mr.
Gunner’s watchfulness, trying to recover the mood in which she had come
down and to drive the message of its gaiety through Mrs. Bailey’s
detachment. She found herself at the end of her tirade, standing once
more facing the group on the sofa; startled by their united appearance
of kindly, smiling, patient, almost patronising tolerance. Lurking
behind it was some kind of amusement. She had been an awkward fool,
rushing in, seeing nothing. They had been discussing business together,
the eternal difficulties of the house. Mr. Gunner was behind it all now,
intimate and helpful and she had come selfishly in, interrupting. Mrs.
Bailey had the right to display indifference to her assumption that
anything she chose to present should receive her undivided attention;
and she had not displayed indifference. If Mr. Gunner had not been there
she would have been her old self. There they sat, together, frustrating
her. Angered by the pressure of her desire for reinstatement she crashed
against their quietly smiling resistance. “Have I been interrupting
you?”
“No, young lady; certainly not,” said Mrs. Bailey in her usual manner,
brushing at her skirt.
“I believe I have,” smiled Miriam obstinately.
Mr. Gunner smiled serenely back at her. There was something
extraordinary in such a smile coming from him. His stupid raillery was
there, but behind it was a modest confidence.
“No,” he said gently. “I was only trying to demonstrate to Mrs. Bailey
the bi-nomial theorem.”