Oberland : $b Pilgrimage, Volume 9 — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
Oberland : $b Pilgrimage, Volume 9
John Stuart Mill · en
“Isn’t it extraordinary,” she said, hoping to hide the fact that she had
missed his last remark, “the way these people leave the lights switched
on all the time, everywhere.”
“Cheap electricity,” he said as if in parenthesis, and as if
apologetically reminding her of what she already knew—“Water power. They
pay a rate and use as much as they like.”
In all his answers there was this manner of apologising for giving
information. And his talk, even the perfect little story of the local
barber and the newspapers, which he told at top pace as if grudging the
moment it wasted, was like a shorthand annotation to essential unspoken
things, shared interests and opinions taken for granted. Talking with
him she no longer felt as she had done last night either that she was at
a private view of an exclusive exhibition, or gathering fresh light on
social problems. There was in him something unbounded, that enhanced the
light reflected into the room from the sunlit snow. His affectionate
allusion to his Cambridge brought to her mind complete in all its
parts—together with gratitude for the peace he gave in which things
could expand unhindered—her own so sparse possession: her week-ends
there with the cousins, their blinkered, comfort-loving academic
friends, the strange sense of at once creeping back into security and
realising how far she had come away from it; their kindnesses, their
secret hope of settling her for life in their enclosed world, and their
vain efforts to mould her to its ways; and then the end, the growing
engrossments in London breaking the link that held her to them and to
the past they embodied—and Cambridge left lit by their sweet
hospitality, by the light streaming on Sunday afternoons through King’s
Chapel windows; the Backs in sunlight, and a memory of the halting
little chime.
When she told him of the things that Cambridge had left with her, she
paused just in time to escape adding to them the gait of the
undergraduates: the slovenly stride whose each footfall sent the chin
forward with a hen-like jerk.
He agreed at once with her choice, but hesitated over the little chime.
“It might have been a new church. I never saw it. But if you had once
heard it you _couldn’t_ forget it.”
It was absurd to be holding to her solitary chime in face of his four
years’ residence. But it seemed now desperately important to state
exactly the quality she had felt and never put into words. She sat
listening—aware of him waiting in a sympathetic stillness—to each note
as it sounded out into the sky above the town, making it no longer
Cambridge but a dream-city, subduing the graceless modern bricks and
mortar to harmony with the ancient beauty of the colleges—until the
whole was a loveliness beneath the evening sky—and presently found
herself speaking with reckless enthusiasm.